What To Do When You Don’t Know What To Do

So many times in our lives, we think we are “on our way”. Things are moving. We are moving.

Then, all of the sudden, things stop!

Where did my sense of direction go? Why don’t I know what to do? There has to be SOMETHING for me to do! Did I lose my purpose? Was I on the wrong track? What happened?!

A sense of panic comes in. When there is no action, we feel lost and perhaps even stupid or useless.

Our River of Life has reached a calm pool, and we’re busy freaking out! Sails go up and down. The Paddles come out, and we paddle on this side and that. New fangled motors are tested. Nothing moves. It’s like there’s an anchor on the boat, and we can’t see the chain to pull it up.

These moments, too, are opportunities. Those calm pools along the River of Your Life are equally as important and valuable. Life should not be white water rafting all the way through!

When we are in action, we feel useful and on purpose. These times of in-action are times when we can redefine and rebalance. They are times to refuel and rejuvenate.

The question becomes, “What do we do when we have nothing to do?”

Here are some places you can explore when you’ve reached one of those calm pools in Your River of Life.

Trust.

These silent times are exactly perfect too. What if you trusted that The Universe has everything under control?

Let’s take the analogy of planting and growing a garden. You prepare the soil by adding nutrients, clearing away the weeds, and making the rows or raised beds to plant your seeds. You pick the seeds you want to plant. A plan is made for which vegetables go where. The dirt is parted, and the seeds sprinkled. You gently cover over the seeds and begin to water.

For the next while, all you need to do is water, and pull the occasional weed that pops up. You don’t see any action or movement. Things are quiet for the time being, and yet, beneath the surface there are all kinds of unseen action!

The seed expands and pops open. A tiny little root begins to squirm its way through the dirt, sucking up all the incredible resources you worked into the soil, and drinking the life-giving water. Before long, its fingers begin stretching up, building up strength to pop through the surface and peak out at the sunlight.

Can you Trust that in these times of silence that the seeds you’ve planted with your thoughts are germinating like the seeds in your garden? Or will you rush around uncovering your seeds daily to see if they are growing, and preventing them from growing?

Trust that all is well. Gently water your seeds, and pull the occasional weed. Enjoy the sunshine and trust. The Universe does not stop he growth of the seeds in the Garden, and it does not stop the growth of the seeds you have planted either.

Nourish.

Use these times as opportunities to take good care of You.

Chances are, when things were moving you were so busy you were not doing those small things that keep you rejuvenated. “I don’t have time,” is often how you would put yourself off. Things were moving! How could you have time to exercise, eat right, or meditate?

As with the garden, those busy times were important, and those times of watering and patiently waiting are equally important.

These can be times to set up new habits of self-care. Here are some new habits you can add to your daily routine.

Meditation. Meditation does not need to take a full hour of your time. It can be as simple as sitting quietly for 5 minutes, and you can add an extra 5 minutes into your shower. There are many forms of active meditations, including walking meditations. Puzzles are wonderful form of meditation. Your focus is only on the puzzle, and all other thoughts move into the background.

Journaling. Journaling can be as simple as writing 5 gratitudes per day. You can write your intentions or desires. Write your joyful experiences. Gather affirmations and quotes that inspire you. Joy Journaling is a fun and creative way to use your Journal.

Exercise. This can be as simple as adding in a 10-30 minute walk each day. There are so many fun and creative ways to exercise. There are a variety dance classes offered. Gyms are offering cycling, kick boxing and much more. You can take up a martial art. There are also creative blendings of exercise forms being offered, such as Nia. Take this time to sample a few until you find one that is fun for you.

Nutrition. When you have more time available, you can get creative with your eating. You do not need to cook all day to get a quality meal. Sometimes taking the time to explore your grocery store or specialty shops in your neighbourhood can open up new creativity in your kitchen. Explore your library or local book store for cooking ideas. Take this time to find some quick and easy recipes you enjoy so when things do get moving again, you’re ready!

Life is like a River. There are times when the waters are flowing with speed, and there are other times where we come into the calm pools and can see the fish and plants growing on the bottom. Take the time to look into the pools. It’s so much more enjoyable than franticly paddling your canoe and missing all the beauty and joy.

Pull your paddle back in the boat. Stretch back and enjoy the sunshine and fresh air. The River will speed up soon enough, and when it does, you’ll be full of energy and ready to go!

*~*~*

Velma Gallant, “The Queen of JOY!”, is an author, international speaker and Lazer Clarity Coach. She hosts her highly acclaimed internet radio show, Welcome Changes Radio where she interviews exciting and dynamic guests such as New York Times best selling author, Neale Donald Walsch, Mike Dooley from "The Secret", and many more. Velma coaches Executives and Entrepreneurs to lazer in on what’s vital to create and experience Joy-Filled Balance in their life and work. Velma can be contacted through her website, http://www.WelcomeChangesRadio.com.

Midlife Crisis or Midlife Adventure?

How did I end up here? What am I doing with my life? What’s missing? Where did all the fun go? Who am I?

Have you been asking yourself any of these questions? Are you frustrated or discouraged about the lack of answers? Have you been so busy being responsible you forgot how to have fun? Is it an unconscious, endless loop of the same tasks each day?

Some call it a mid-life crisis. Chances are you're simply exhausted from living on autopilot. There's no joy in just existing.

It’s a powerful observation, but what do you do with it?

All too often when someone bumps up against this feeling, they try to do the things they did as a young adult. The problem with this approach is those activities are not filling the void any more than the day-to-day grind is.

How do you turn your crisis into an adventure? How do you get the passion and excitement back in your life?

The first step is to remember who you are. Yes, I said remember who you ARE. Sometimes we get so busy doing, we forget all about the be-ing.

The following exercise will support you in this remembering process.

1. List 3 qualities you absolutely love about yourself.

2. List 3 things you do well.

3. Ask 3 friends what they feel is your best quality.

4. Ask 3 friends what they feel you do best.

Chances are, once you take the time to remember who you already are, you’re going to like yourself again. Wouldn’t that be wonderful?

Once you have completed this exercise, you can begin to look at what new qualities you’d like to have, and new things you’d like to learn to do well. That’s when the adventure begins!

This is a really important point I want to bring to your attention. Notice how I languaged that. “New qualities you’d like to have” and “new things you’d like to learn”. It’s important and valuable for you look at things as new and additional rather than wrong and needs to be changed or deleted.

Here are a three questions you can ask yourself to begin your new Midlife Adventure.

1. List one quality you’d love to have.

2. List one thing you’d like to learn to do well.

3. Choose the Celebrations you receive for taking these first few steps on your new Adventure.

I’m starting you out with one quality and one skill for a reason. You built your present strengths mostly one at a time. By playing with one at a time, you automatically increase your success exponentially.

Let me give you a visual for this.

You have 10 fingers on your hands. Each finger pushes a new quality or skill into your life. All of your effort gets distributed amongst the 10 fingers, so each gets 1/10th of your effort.

What would happen if all 10 fingers pushed on one new quality or skill? Yes, your quality or skill gets 100% of your effort, but your results are actually exponential. You’re putting in 10 times the effort, but your results will far exceed your expectations.


To summarize, there are two steps to change your Crisis into an Adventure.


1. Remember who you are.

2. Add new qualities or skills that excite and grow you into who you’d like to be.

This mid-point of your life is a wonderful new beginning. Make it an Adventure!

*~*~*

Velma Gallant, “The Queen of JOY!”, is an Abundance Coach, speaker and author. She is a best-selling co-author with Mark Victor Hansen, Deepak Chopra and Dr. Wayne Dyer in “Wake Up…Live the Life You Love…Finding Personal Freedom”. Velma also writes a weekly e-newsletter which can be found at http://www.WelcomeChanges.com. You can contact Velma by email at velmaATwelcomechangesDOTcom, or toll-free at 1-800-992-2863.

Use Your Senses

There is more to Vision than sight. Being a powerful Visionary requires you to use all your senses.

Do you remember the 3 monkeys? See no Evil, Hear no Evil, Speak no Evil.

There is wisdom in that, and to make it more fun and the focus more productive, I’ve changed it to “See Joy, Hear Joy, Speak Joy!”

Let’s start with See Joy. Go on the hunt for things that bring you joy, or put the smile on your face. Turn off the News, and visit places like GoodNewsNetwork.com. Use tools like the Vision Board where you gather pictures of the things you desire to be, do or have. When you see people throughout your day, think of one thing you appreciate about them. When you look in the mirror, think of one thing you appreciate about yourself.

Next is Hear Joy. Listen to uplifting audios. Listen to music that lifts your spirit. Listen to the silence from time to time. Listen to nature. Allow yourself to listen when others speak kindly of you. Listen to the celebrations of others.

Finally, Speak Joy. Speak kindly to others. Speak kindly of yourself. Record your voice speaking your Vision, and listen to it often. Speak about your successes. Speak about other people’s successes. Speak about possibilities and gratitude. Speak about the things that make you smile.

As you move through your week, pick one of your senses to focus on each day. If you have a Journal, keep track of what kind of day you have when you do this. When you practice Seeing Joy, how much more do you see now that you are consciously looking?

By the end of your week you’ll be amazed at the results of consciously seeing, speaking and hearing Joy. Your life will be filled with Joy, and you will be a magnet to your desires.

Use your senses for Joy.

*~*~*

Velma Gallant is an Author, Speaker, Trainer and Abundance Coach. She's a co-author in a best-selling book series with Mark Victor Hansen, Deepak Chopra, and Wayne Dyer called "Wake Up Live the Life you Love: Finding Personal Freedom". Velma is the creator of Living Abundant Joy where she interviewed 19 outrageously successful speakers, marketers and coaches on Abundance. She publishes a weekly e-newsletter called "Welcome Changes". Velma coaches entrepreneurs and business people to be abundantly successful in both business and life. You can visit Velma's website at www.WelcomeChanges.com, or reach her by email at velma@welcomechanges.com .

The Law of Magnetics

There are a few Laws of the Universe. The Law of Attraction is one we hear the most about. One that is just as important to be aware of, and actually will support you with the Law of Attraction, is the Law of Magnetics.

The Law of Magnetics: As we attract, we also repel.

What does this mean, and why is it important to be aware of?

We know that a magnet has two sides. An attracting side, and the other side repels or pushes away. Try putting two repelling sides of a magnet together, and you can actually feel them push apart.

What's really cool about this law is this.

Have you ever had an email, letter or phone call from someone who said your products or services were not of value? Have they said something you thought was really good was actually bad?

The typical reaction to something like this is to feel frusted, angry or sad. I know I've gone through a whole range of emotions when this has happened to me. It happened to me recently. It was a great reminder of the Law of Magnetics.

The thing is, as you are repelling (negative feedback, for example), you are also ATTRACTING. If you repel someone who is not a match for your products or services, you also attract those who ARE a match for your products or services!

Usually repelling is silent--an unsubscribe here or there. We barely notice them. With each unsubscribe, someone subscribes. The releasing of the old makes way for the new.

Every once in a while, though, we get a LOUD repel. Someone sends you some feedback that sends you realing.

I invite you to take notice that if you repel LOUD, chances are you attract just as loud!

When I get a "repelling" feedback, I consistently receive five more feedback that make me beam with gratitude and appreciation.

It has gotten to the point that when I receive a "Repel", I watch in excitement and anticipation for the "Attract(s)" that always follow.

The Law of Magnetics: As we attract, we also repel.

As you move through your day, notice where you are attracting and repelling. Don't let those "Repels" get you down. Smile with each one, and then watch for the "Attract(s)" to follow quickly. It's the Law.

*~*~*

Velma Gallant is an Author, Speaker, Trainer and Abundance Coach. She's a co-author in a best-selling book series with Mark Victor Hansen, Deepak Chopra, and Wayne Dyer called "Wake Up Live the Life you Love: Finding Personal Freedom". Velma is the creator of Living Abundant Joy where she interviewed 19 outrageously successful speakers, marketers and coaches on Abundance. She publishes a weekly e-newsletter called "Welcome Changes". Velma coaches entrepreneurs and business people to be abundantly successful in both business and life. You can visit Velma's website at www.WelcomeChanges.com, or reach her by email at velma@welcomechanges.com .

The IF in Life

Life is full of IF’s.

Usually it’s “If only I could/would have…” or “If only it/I wasn’t…” Have you felt those “If’s”?

What if you could play with the IF in Life?

What if you could make a game of the IF in Life?

IF can be a possibility thing of looking forward, if you choose it to be.

One of my favorite ways to do this is to play the “What If Game”.

It’s a perfect way to begin thinking of possibilities before you believe in the possibilities.

Did you know can begin making shifts before you believe? It’s true!

Many Guru’s teach that Belief is an important component of creating the life of your dreams.

They are right, AND you can move towards your dreams and intentions before you believe.

How? One way is to play the “What If Game”.

How to Play the What If Game

You will be using your intentions and desires for this game. It’s also a great way to get clear on what your intentions and desires are.

Simply add “What if” to the front of your intentions when you write them down or speak. For example, “What if I was a successful business owner?” or “What if I had an active and healthy lifestyle?”

When and Where to Play

The best place to play your game is in your Journal. Your Journal is the most powerful Abundance Tool in your toolkit.

This gives your intentions their first physical form. It begins the creation process. You also have a record of your intentions that you can go back on. This will give added focus to your intentions, and also allow you to celebrate as you notice how many of your intentions come into reality.

The next best place to play your game is verbally. Many times we have tasks that occupy us physically, but we can still play mentally and verbally. These tasks can include things like walking, driving, or washing the dishes.

How often to Play

Add the “What If Game” to your daily routine, and you will notice changes quickly.

You will notice how your thinking begins to shift. You will notice more possibilities in your daily life.

Why is this valuable?

Possibility thinking shifts your vibration further up the scale, and the higher your vibration, the more magnetic you are to your desires.

Simply put, when you think of possibilities, you feel better. When you feel better, more good things happen.


What if your life was full of possibilities?

It is—if you want it to be.

*~*~*

Velma Gallant is an Author, Speaker, Trainer and Abundance Coach. She's a co-author in a best-selling book series with Mark Victor Hansen, Deepak Chopra, and Wayne Dyer called "Wake Up Live the Life you Love: Finding Personal Freedom". Velma is the creator of Living Abundant Joy where she interviewed 19 outrageously successful speakers, marketers and coaches on Abundance. She publishes a weekly e-newsletter called "Welcome Changes". Velma coaches entrepreneurs and business people to be abundantly successful in both business and life. You can visit Velma's website at www.WelcomeChanges.com, or reach her by email at velma@welcomechanges.com .

Ask Yourself – It’s All About You

Are there things in your experience that you do not want, and you’re not sure why they’re there? Are you unclear how to change or shift those experiences?

When I feel this way, it always comes back to one thing. It’s all about me. It’s the same for you too. It’s all about you.

That sounds a little bit weird, and it’s true. Let me explain.

People who were (and are) important to me did not respect my business. There were no tangible products they would buy. They wouldn’t hire a coach. I worked from home. That’s not a “real job”.

Over the years, I have come to understand that how people treat me was often a reflection of how I treat myself.

I had to ask myself, how was I not respecting my business? Was I treating my business with the consistency of a job? Did I set specific hours? If I set certain tasks for myself, did I follow through? Was I putting things off? How could I respect my business (and myself) more?

Some of the things I shifted were giving myself a specific work space, and actually going there to work. I blocked things off in my calendar, including my “me” time. I printed my calendar and stuck it on the fridge so others in the family were aware of my schedule.

What’s one thing in your experience that you’d like to shift?

Do you find people do not respect your time? Ask yourself, are you respecting your time?

Do you find other people overstepping your boundaries? Ask yourself, do you honor your boundaries?

This type of self-coaching question can lead to some pretty incredible shifts if you’re willing to look there. This self-coaching can apply to all areas of your life, including relationships, business and health.

As you move through your day today, if you experience something “not quite right”, check in. See if there’s a self-coaching question you can ask yourself.

It’s all about you! Ask yourself.

*~*~*

Velma Gallant is an Author, Speaker, Trainer and Abundance Coach. She's a co-author in a best-selling book series with Mark Victor Hansen, Deepak Chopra, and Wayne Dyer called "Wake Up Live the Life you Love: Finding Personal Freedom". Velma is the creator of Living Abundant Joy where she interviewed 19 outrageously successful speakers, marketers and coaches on Abundance. She publishes a weekly e-newsletter called "Welcome Changes". Velma coaches entrepreneurs and business people to be abundantly successful in both business and life. You can visit Velma's website at www.WelcomeChanges.com, or reach her by email at velma@welcomechanges.com .

Permanent Changes

I heard a new quote the other day, and it made so much sense to me!

Practice Makes Permanent

What a brilliant way of looking at it!

I’ve heard of “Practice Makes Perfect”. The one thing I wasn’t keen on with respect to that quote is the “perfect” part. It’s so easy to get caught up in the perfectionism trap. I prefer not to use that word.

One part of my life where I see the power of this quote is with my habits.

I’ve found that the best way to change my bad habits is to create a new habit that supports me and my goals, and the best way to create a new habit is to practice it lots. I definitely want my new supportive habits to be permanent!

Are you ready to make a new, more supportive habit permanent?

If so, I have a valuable and simple exercise for you.

Here is a list of materials you’ll need.

1. Journal – You’ll need a place to write your intentions and experiences. Pick something you’ll enjoy writing in.

2. Calendar – Experts agree that it takes 21 days to create a new habit. You’ll be keeping track!

Something important to remember—only choose one habit at a time to play with. This will allow you to keep focus on your intention. Tackling too many habits at once will spread your attention thin.

In your journal, as your self the following questions:

1. What’s one habit I have that I’d like to transform? (Hint: This will usually come out as a “don’t want”. For example, I don’t want to eat bon-bons every day.)

2. What new, supportive habit would I like to replace it with? (Hint: You can usually take the “don’t want” from question 1 and give it a 180 degree flip to find your do want. For example, I eat well every day, and treat myself to a bon-bon on Sundays.)

3. What’s one thing I can do today to practice this new habit? (Hint: Pick an action you feel good about. Write it down in your journal. You do not need to do the same action each day. Sometimes changing things up can make the transformation more fun.)

You will be repeating Step 3 each day for a total of 21 days.

On your calendar, put an X on each day that you practice your new habit.

There is one important detail to this part of the exercise. If you happen to miss a day, the count of days for practicing returns to one. What this means is if you miss day 8, you will be starting again at day one the next day. I want you to get through 21 consecutive days of practicing.

I can already see a few faces being made about this part of the exercise. “You said it was simple!” Yes, I did. It is simple. Being consistent may be simple, but it isn’t always easy.

If you’re one of the faces I’m seeing, ask yourself this question. How much do you want this new habit?

Too often we are the ones that hold us back from achieving our success, whether it’s creating new habits, or achieving any number of goals in our life.

If you find yourself missing days, and are still determined to make your new habit permanent, I invite you to write the following question daily in your journal:

4. How much do I want this new habit?

To recap, to create a new habit, ask yourself the three (perhaps four) self-coaching questions listed above. Write the answers in your journal. Answer question 3 (and 4 if necessary) in your journal daily. Mark off each day in your calendar until you have 21 consecutive days completed with this exercise.

There is one last thing that you’ll need to do each day. This, to me, is the most important step.

Celebrate! Each and every day that you complete the exercise Celebrate! At the end of the 21 days, have a HUGE Celebration! Give yourself a gift. Pat yourself on the back. Phone a friend or two up and brag! Send me an email and brag!

What’s one new habit you’d like to create? I’m seeing you already there!

*~*~*

Velma Gallant is an Author, Speaker, Trainer and Abundance Coach. She's a co-author in a best-selling book series with Mark Victor Hansen, Deepak Chopra, and Wayne Dyer called "Wake Up Live the Life you Love: Finding Personal Freedom". Velma is the creator of Living Abundant Joy where she interviewed 19 outrageously successful speakers, marketers and coaches on Abundance. She publishes a weekly e-newsletter called "Welcome Changes". Velma coaches entrepreneurs and business people to be abundantly successful in both business and life. You can visit Velma's website at www.WelcomeChanges.com, or reach her by email at velma@welcomechanges.com .